Gay scientists isolate the Christian gene

Gay researchers at the Pink Tiger Research unit, working for years to determine what it is that makes people Christian, have isolated the gene which causes the ailment. They hope to use this finding to cure people of their Christianity.

We've already prevented this rat from being born Christian, and hopefully humans will follow.

The controversial research may end the long running debate about the cause of Christianity. The parents of one Christian have welcomed the news with relief. "We always worried that if we'd done something different our child would not have ended up a Christian."

But converting the research into a commercial cure may take years. The wait leaves many families frustrated. "We have sent our children to camps to cure them, but no matter how many times we play them Pet Shop Boys they just come back talking about Jesus," said one gay parent.